Tonight during family movie night, Olivia said, "Isn't tomorrow going to be MARCH?" We all bursted into laughter. Yep, folks, unless Baby P decides to show herself in the next 3 hrs we will not be getting our February baby. I thought it'd be cool to have a February baby at the beginning of all this because that would continue our birthday months all in a row.
Oh well. I can't say I am sad. March is blowing in and I can say without a doubt that I will definitely have a baby in the month of March. My doula texted me today and asked me what I had learned today. She has texted me with uplifting, positive and supportive thoughts and affirmations. She has been an incredible force in keeping me positive and centered in a peaceful place where I could stay in tune with the Spirit and my instincts. I will love her forever for what she has done for me in this regard.
I went to church today and it was wonderful to be there. We kind of faked everyone out because Sam, the girls and my Mom walked in the chapel while I was hanging up my coat. Right at the moment when the people sitting behind Sam and Mom were leaning forward to ask if we had had the baby, I walked right in to find them sitting in the middle of the very front row of pews. I smiled at everyone and took my seat.
So, what have I learned today? Well, I have learned that peace does come when you let expectations go and just let things be. I have learned to trust in the Lord more. I have learned that it is ok to cry and that stillness and peace do come after a resignation of expectations. Last night, as I was going to sleep, I was feeling frustrated. We really thought Paisley was coming and it was a let down to have our expectations up so high. I began my prayers and I didn't know what to ask for or what to say. I simply told the Lord that I wanted what He wanted for me, tears rolled across my face and I said, "Amen".
This morning, I woke feeling very well rested and mildly despondent. I didn't know quite what to feel. I wasn't sure what to pray for. I said a prayer of gratitude. It was freeing to list all those things I am grateful for. I smiled at myself at the mirror and said it was going to be a good day and it has. Tomorrow will be a good day too. Welcome March!
7 comments:
Your strength is inspiring. Amazing and honest. Maybe her name should be Persuasion or Patience. ;) We'll continue waiting on baited breath for her arrival.
You are so amazing. I love you, and good luck!
Oh, man! And I was hoping the 23 hours + between posts meant that stubborn baby decided to come. You're doing wonderful and I'm amazed at how positive you are. Welcome March!
I am with the last comment! You wrote that you were 7cm and that even though you weren't in labor, I was for sure the baby had to have come since it had been so long between posts! You know how to keep us waiting...
Everything you are learning along the way with this pregnancy is helping us ALL learn. Thanks for sharing your beautiful thoughts.
You doing great Tisha!!! My 4th child was over two weeks late. Her delivery was by far my best and the recovery was amazing. Yours will be fabulous too. Sophia is my little cuddle bug now. May your day be progressive!
You hang in there. 7cms?!! I think you better stick close to home babe. That kid is planning a quick, relatively painless birth for you. You're going to go into labor, push twice, and she'll be here. Ring of fire? Snap...
Really, being uncomfortable, hormonal and tired of waiting is probably wearing you down but you are amazing. Focus inward and care for yourself physically and emotionally. Your mother is there to help you. Let her. Let go and rest up. Not long now. (that is if you're not having or holding her already) Breathe. Your abilities are all there inside you waiting til they are needed. You are amazing and you ARE doing this. Every moment that goes by you are doing what is required. It IS happening one moment at a time. Let it be. She is coming.
Lisa
Besides the fact that it means more waiting, March isn't so bad. Our very own Little Man has a birthday coming up at the end of this week! Maybe Paisley is simply waiting to come so they can share birthdays! ha ha.
ha.
ha ha.
Ok, probably not too funny to a 13-days-past-her-due-date pregnant woman.
Forgive me.
:)
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